Category: Group Therapy

Note: This is Part I of a four-part series of blog articles. Here I will introduce 2 of the reasons for reluctance to join a therapy group. In the 3 follow-up articles, entitled “Why Are People Reluctant to Join Group Therapy? Part II, Part III and Part IV”, I will present the remaining 6 reasons for this reluctance.

 

Why Do People Hesitate to Join a Therapy Group?

Everyone draws their own line in the sand and sets their own personal limits. We are controlled by our own strong opinions and personal values and judgments. For most people, group therapy lies on the other side of the line in the “forbidden zone”. Plus, many people have a strong bias or prejudice against psychotherapy in general.

Usually these opinions and beliefs are based on fear, little knowledge and no direct experience. Many of their fears, opinions and beliefs may be faulty and they certainly limit their own experiences and lives. It is sad to know that people limit themselves so much and by doing so they often prolong their pain and problems.

Group Psychotherapy vs Individual Psychotherapy

Group therapy is a bonafide psychological method of psychotherapy and years of research has proven that for many clients group therapy can be as or more effective than individual therapy.

Although many clients prefer individual therapy sessions over group sessions and believe that individual counseling is a superior method of therapy, many group members get positive results from their participation in group sessions. They benefit and overcome nagging problems and persistent complaints. Groups can be very powerful in getting desired results.

Even though group members earn positive outcomes and the fears associated to group therapy are usually exaggerated and unrealistic, why are people so reluctant to join a therapy group?

 

8 Reasons Why People Are Reluctant to Join a Psychotherapy Group

Of course, everyone has their own set of reasons why they are leery and refuse to join a group. Below are the first 2 common reasons why people are reluctant to join:

1. Fear of exposing shameful past behaviors and biased beliefs

In psychotherapy groups, members need to reveal why they are in group, what brought them there. It is imperative that participants are open and honest and disclose to one another what they are struggling with and what their group goals are. They present their background history, their current status and why they believe they are challenged. How can each participant, the group leader or the other members ever provide help or determine if they have made progress in therapy if they don’t reveal this information?

And yes, sharing includes their shameful behaviors, thoughts and feelings. It also includes revealing their embarrassing prejudicial beliefs and opinions. How can  the individuals in the group make significant progress if they are not being genuine and open with one another?

Most men and women are afraid of being judged and criticized, shunned or disliked because of their past and present experiences, behaviors and values. Most early entrants into group therapy want to impress and be liked by the other members. But groups are not like typical social meetings. Members are purposefully there to expose themselves and to be vulnerable, not to cover-up, pretend, look good and fool the other participants.

Taking risks and being courageous enough to be seen and heard are the best and fastest ways to grow and change. Challenging and confronting our fears stimulates self-development and personal freedom. Getting their shameful past behaviors and experiences out into the open with others is our highway to health and change.

So, sharing shameful experiences and biased beliefs is exactly what is wanted in a group of members committed to their own psychological development. Without this exposure and courage, they will not grow.

2. Convinced that other members will not accept or support them

Most new men and women members in a therapy group assume that the other members will reject them and withdraw from them if they ever knew how awful they have been and how despicable their beliefs are. This expectation is common. During their life time, they have learned what not to share because they have received negative feedback in the past.

However, in a serious therapy group, members are encouraged to be vulnerable and to risk being rejected and criticized, to test whether or not they will be accepted and supported.

Usually, in the group therapy environment, members reveal ugly, distorted and embarrassing things about themselves but seldom do they get rejected or criticized as they had feared. They are usually supported, acknowledged and admired by the other members for their courage in exposing themselves. After testing their fear a few times, they appreciate the other group members and develop a safe place to go where they can be more authentic and feel nurtured by other wounded souls.

Men and women group participants fear that they will expose their real thoughts and feelings, like superficiality, fear, anger, guilt, defenselessness, depression, confusion, paranoia, humiliation, aggression, inability to trust that we deem to be inadequacies in us. Most new members also fear exposing their feelings of loneliness, alienation and inability to find supportive allies in the group.

Many members get angry easily and express their intolerance outside of the group meetings. They often fear allowing others to see this because they judge anger and negative emotions as weaknesses that are shameful. We fear that we will not fit or be accepted into the “club”.

 

You can read Part II of “Why are People Reluctant to Join Group Therapy?” by clicking the link below:  http://www.drrevelmiller.com/2019/12/why-are-people-reluctant-to-join-group-therapy-part-ii/

 

You can read my other blog articles about “Group Therapy” by clicking the link below:

http://www.drrevelmiller.com/category/group-therapy/

To learn more about my “Group Therapy” services, click on this link:    

http://www.drrevelmiller.com/what-we-treat/group-therapy/

 

Are you interested in joining a therapy group? Call me soon to schedule an initial consultation session – 805-448-5053.

Are Groups Important?

“It takes a village to raise a child”. There’s a good reason why that aphorism has endured: it’s true.

Our culture lionizes individual heroes but such a perspective almost always ignores the many people who play a role in the hero’s success. Group collective action is how humans really attain new goals and, for that matter, new heights.

Just remember, in your own life, how important different types of groups have been. All of us have been members of and shaped by groups. You may have participated in: your nuclear family, extended family, classrooms, schools, athletic teams, work groups, social cliques, scouts, bands, orchestras, dormitories, fraternities, sororities, military, etc.

You may have spent many of your best and most important and memorable hours in groups and learned and grew from these various experiences. Groups influence us all and without them we cannot develop and mature. Groups are like food to humans.

Now consider the potential impact of group therapy. Group therapy actually has a long, successful track record. Why? Simply put, because it works. In some cases, it is the best possible choice for anyone seeking support, guidance, recovery and healing. Group therapy is designed to impact you in a positive way.

The Dynamics of Group Therapy

Now imagine being in a room of relative strangers with a therapist – all of whom are sharing intimate personal details about their lives. Although this may be the most common reason why some people refuse to participate in group therapy, ironically it just may be the best reason to give it a try. Without trying new things and taking risks we do not grow psychologically.

In group therapy, all the members witness interpersonal dynamics as they happen in real time, live. These spontaneous and real-time discussions, disclosures and revelations speak volumes about the current issues in each group member’s life. Group therapy is an effective way to display the kind of interactions that each member lives out in their daily life with family, friends, co-workers, etc.

Each group session also presents an opportunity for each member to practice new behaviors on for size instead of behaving in automatic ways. Shifting creates changes.

Unlike individual therapy, the dynamics are not all about a one-on-one personal relationship or a particular therapeutic style. In a group setting, the members may become more self-aware by observe their own behaviors, thoughts and feelings. They also learn about others and how they compare.

Often, group members are more honest and open in their interactions. As you interact within the group, so much subtle information is being shared through body language, emotional triggers, tone of voice, choice of words, silence, withdrawal and other interactions. These are often quite different than what is displayed in an individual therapy session.

9 Reasons Why Process Groups Are Effective

In process groups, you interact with the other members and reveal things about yourself and listen to others talk about their life experiences.

Here are 9 ways in which process therapy groups can be helpful to you:

1. You will realize that you are similar to other people and not so unique, wretched or inadequate.
2. You will increase your hope in your future and in humanity.
3. You will profit from giving to others and witnessing their healing.
4. You will become less fearful of and sensitive to criticism from others.
5. The greater number of perspectives and personalities in the room dramatically increases the likelihood you will receive helpful information and encounter insightful thoughts, ideas, suggestions or observations that have meaning for you.
6. Your self-identity will change and improve as you receive feedback from others.
7. In a group session, you may listen and hear differently and receive important feedback about your behavior and how you come across to others.
8. The group becomes like a laboratory of sorts where you can learn and practice enhanced social and communication skills.
9. The more courageous you are and the more risks you take in front of others, the more you will grow.

The Comfort of a Group

You may feel shame about the struggles that cause you to start counseling. Left to your own inner critical voice, you may perceive yourself as uniquely flawed and inadequate. You may believe that if anyone really knew what went on in your head you would be immediately rejected. Most of us don’t feel comfortable talking about our unspeakable thoughts and “weird” imaginations to our spouse, siblings or best friend. In a trusted group, you will talk about the unspeakable and free yourself from old fears.

Oddly, there are two types of comfort gained from within a therapy group. First comes the essential realization that others feel as isolated and defective as you do. They have problems but still seem like decent, likable, sane and functional human beings. It can be freeing and comforting to be part of a group seeking to help all of its members.

The second comfort encompasses the warmth of social support. Rather than retreat or isolate yourself due to your fear of stigma and rejection, you and the others in your group will risk coming forward by revealing shameful behaviors, emotions and thoughts – and being accepted.

But Still, Why Should I Join a Group?

You become a group member with an unrelenting dual purpose: 1) To be healed and 2) To help others be healed.

Therefore, members take their group experience seriously and they aren’t superficial and they don’t “mess around” during the sessions. They try to listen, be honest, reveal themselves and give helpful feedback to one another. There is nothing else in the world like this type of safe collective support and action.

 

You can read my other articles about “Group Therapy” here on this blog.

To learn more about my “Group Therapy” services, click on this link: http://www.drrevelmiller.com/what-we-treat/group-therapy/

If you are interested in joining a therapy group, call me soon to schedule an initial consultation session – 805-448-5053.

How Do I Start the Process of Selecting a Group Leader?

In a previous blog article entitled “How Do I Select a Group Therapist?”, I make suggestions on:

• How to identify a group leader
• How to gather information
• Questions to ask the leader
• How to make the decision whether or not to join a group

Click here to visit that article:  http://www.drrevelmiller.com/2019/10/how-do-i-select-a-group-therapist/

Combining the information in these two articles will make it easier for you to confidently select a group therapist who can help you or a loved one.

Meet a Leader Face-to-Face

It is my opinion that all professional group therapist should meet in-person with all potential group members before inviting them to join a group. This is particularly true if the group is an ongoing weekly process group. If it is a short-term educational group, like 4 to 8 session in length, then they may not need to meet with all members beforehand.

Here Are the Steps to Take to Consult In-Person with a Group Leader

1. Make an appointment with the therapist
2. Be ready with your own list of written questions to ask the group leader

In order to qualify you for a group, the therapist will probably have a set of their own questions to ask you about: your current problems, background, past experience in psychotherapy, medications, treatment goals, etc. Be prepared to listen to what they have to say about the group and answer their questions accurately. As you are evaluating them, they too are assessing whether or not you would be a good “match” for a group and could receive the results you are looking for.

Include the Following Important Questions on Your Written List

Ask the leader:

• What is your training and experience in group leadership?
• Have you led groups before?
• How many groups have you led and what kinds of groups were they?
• Have you personally experienced being a group therapy member?
• What types of groups do you specialize in leading?
• What type of leadership style do you have?
• Will there be a co-leader working with you?
• What is the role of the patients in the group? What do they do?
• What type of patients is this group designed for?
• How many members are in the group and what is the maximum size?
• What are the expected patient benefits or results of the group therapy?
• What type of topics do you discuss in the group sessions?
• What can I do to ensure that I get the most out of my group participation?
• Are all your group members required to commit to a contract or a set of expectations to follow? May I see a copy of that agreement?
• Are there current openings in this group?
• How do I join the group?

Confirm the following information about the group meetings:

• Verify the cost of the sessions and the time and methods of payment
• Verify if healthcare insurance can be submitted and reimbursed
• Verify the name, place, day, time and start date
• Verify the number and length of the group meetings
• Verify if the group leader attends all of the sessions

The Job of the Group Therapist

The purpose of the group leader is to:

• Attract and select appropriate members to join a group
• Have expertise in the topics of discussion and problems focused on
• Facilitate the group process
• Connect with all of the members
• Encourage group interaction amongst the members
• Ensure that the group is a safe, trustworthy, cohesive and healing environment

To fulfill their purpose in the group, the therapist should have a depth of training, knowledge and experience as a leader.

In addition, it is a benefit if the therapist has personally participated as a member in a therapy group to know what it is like to be a group member.

The group therapist that you meet with should be proficient at helping you determine if a therapy group would work well for you. Only then should they invite you to join the group.

 

As an experienced group psychotherapist, I have a strong faith in the power of group therapy to help people change.

To learn more about my therapy groups, click on this link:  http://www.drrevelmiller.com/what-we-treat/group-therapy/

Call me at 805-448-5053 if you want to talk with me about group therapy.

Here’s a Little History about Group Therapy

Group therapy was developed in the mid 1940’s in the USA and became a more popular form of psychological treatment in the 1960’s. It’s a bona fide treatment modality and recognized by mental health professionals to be as effective as individual therapy for some children and adults.

Currently, group psychotherapy is practiced throughout the USA in various agencies, institutions, associations, clinics and in private practices and usually led by psychologists, psychiatrists, counselors and social workers.

How Do I Find Local Group Therapist?

You may have heard about group therapy but you may not know any group leaders. So, ask your physician, psychotherapists, counselors, friends and family members and call some mental health treatment facilities in your area.

By searching online for “therapy groups” and “group therapists” you should definitely find a number of groups and leaders. You will probably discover that psychologists, marriage and family therapists, and social workers provide most of the group work.

Contact the Group Therapy Leaders

After identifying some nearby potential groups and/or therapists, call the leaders of the groups you are interested in. Most group leaders are pleased to speak with potential new group members who are interested in joining a group.

Consult with the Leaders by Phone

Introduce yourself and why you are interested in group therapy. Tell them what you are personally struggling with and what you think you are looking for.

Ask the following preliminary questions by phone:

• Do you currently lead a group?
• What type of groups do you lead?
• What is the focus of the group?
• Do you have an opening in the group?
• Might this group be a possible “fit” for me?
• What is the cost of the group and how do you get paid?
• Could my healthcare insurance cover some or all of my costs?
• Do you have a flyer that describes the group that you could send to me?
• If you don’t have a group for me, can you please refer me to another local agency or leader?
• If I am a potential new group member, can I meet you in-person to learn more?

Request a Face-to-Face Meeting with a Group Therapist

After getting all the preliminary information and you believe that a group meets your needs, has an opening for a new member, and you are available when the group meets, then call the therapist and request an introductory consultation to gather more information. It is wise for you and for the leader to meet face-to-face before attending the group.

To see a helpful list of specific questions to ask a group therapist in a face-to-face consultation meeting, read my other blog article entitled “Questions to Ask a Group Therapist When Deciding to Join.” Click here to read the article:  http://www.drrevelmiller.com/2019/10/questions-to-ask-a-group-therapist-when-deciding-to-join/ 

How Do I Decide Whether or Not to Join a Group?

After meeting with the group leader, consider the following factors if you are seriously committed to joining a therapy group:

• Is the leader compassionate, articulate and understanding?
• Does he/she have enough experience as a group therapist?
• Does the therapist command respect and embody the “presence” of a confident leader?
• Do you trust the leader?
• Do you feel like this group will fit your treatment needs and goals?
• Can you regularly afford to pay for your group sessions?
• Do you have any obstacles to regularly attending the group sessions?
• Can you commit to the the group contract or set of rules and expectations?
• Do you feel open and excited about participating in this group?

 

I consult on the phone about my groups, have descriptive flyers on my groups, and require that all potential new members meet in-person with me. If they want to join the group and if I invite them in, then each new member must agree to my set of rules and expectations about group behavior.

As an experienced group psychotherapist, I am here to help you and I have personally participated in a number of groups as a member. Most importantly, I have a firm belief in the power of group therapy to help people change.

 

To learn more about my therapy groups, click on this link:  http://www.drrevelmiller.com/what-we-treat/group-therapy/

If you are interested in talking with me about my groups, please call me at 805-448-5053.